Uncle Glennie’s Stories for Childish Adults

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Uncle Glennie’s Stories for Childish Adults
A sizeable number of these eighty stories originally appeared on the website Persiflage.ca
The cover illustration is a still image taken from Leslie Supnet’s film A Time is Terrible Thing to Waste which was based on a story written by Glen Johnson.

Here is an excerpt:

The Little Girl
Once upon a time there was a little girl who lived next to a smallish lake with her mother and her two older sisters. Most days, if it was at all nice, the little girl would go out and sit down by the lake and watch the ducks. Most days the ducks would just swim quietly back and forth. Occasionally the ducks would quack. From time to time they would stick their faces in the water. The little girl was pretty sure they were up to something.
Her mother told the little girl that she was being paranoid but she was not dissuaded. Her oldest sister just rolled her eyes whenever the little girl spoke of the ducks but her second oldest sister kind of egged her on.
“You must keep an eye on them.” her second oldest sister said “You wouldn’t want to miss anything.”
The little girl had no way of knowing that her second oldest sister was only saying this so that the little girl wouldn’t want to follow her second oldest sister when she went to the mall with her friends. The little girl was under the impression that she was getting good advice.
Then one day the little girl had a visitor. A nice man in a blue suit came to the door asking for the little girl. When she said that she was indeed the little girl, the man in the blue suit handed her the restraining order that the ducks had filed against her.
With the little girl safely out of the way the ducks were free to pursue their plan to kidnap the little girl’s second oldest sister.

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